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| | Finding a Jewish Community. When you make the decision to convert you frequently find that you have to move to a new community or shortly after converting you realize you really want to move to a larger/more compatible community. This is not an easy step to take and can be confusing. Below is some of the things I did that worked for me: Figure out what you want/need in a community:- What community size are you looking for?
A. large community (many synagogues) or
B. Mid-size one (3-6 synagogues)
C. Large City, small city, large town
most rabbis/beit dins will require you move to a community larger than a 1-2 synagogue town (but not all so make sure you understand your rabbi/beit din's requirements if you are doing this for your conversion) - What haskafa (modern O, Chasidic, yeshivish, mixed, etc.) are you looking for
- Create a list of what Jewish resources you require:
A. kosher shops/restaurants (number/type/etc. - what do you need?)
B. eruv (is this important to you?)
C. Jewish schools (one/several/type - think of the future)
D. Shiurim (adult torah learning) (is having many options important to you?) - What can you afford - where can you get a job/go to school and afford rent or housing - remember you are likely to have to accept smaller housing or giving up "extras" in order to manage the cost of conversion and moving - in the end you'll realize the trade-off was worthwhile
How to find a community that meets the above needs- Use the OU.org to look and see what communities/synagogues are available in your state/cities you are considering and then use shamash.org to find listings for kosher stores/bakeries/restaurants in those areas
- Ask on various lists/groups/forums you are on for information or suggestions for specific state/cities (remember each of us want something different in a community so just because a friend loves community x and dislikes community y doesn't mean that will be how you feel) - use the questions above (number of synagogues, haskafa, and other things that are important to you), send an email/do a post saying "I'm looking for x, y, and z in a community in state any suggestions?"
- Find out if people on your various lists know if the rabbis in that community do conversions (if you haven't completed yours yet)
- If you are working with a rabbi ask him what his "you must live in a community" requirements are - does he have a list of communities or a requirement on size/number of synagogues and other Jewish resources - also ask him if he has recommendation for a community for you
- Don't be afraid to ask people you know from the internet that you know live in an area you are considering to put you up for Shabbos or a meal
When you are ready to visit a community:- Call the hospitality committee and tell them you are thinking of moving to the area and ask them to find you places to stay, meals, someone to sit with you during synagogue, also ask them number of synagogues, haskafa of the synagogues, co-operation/joint programming between the synagogues, and other things that are important to you
- Visit potential communities a number of times (at least 3 - I did 6+ visits at the 2 "finalist") - both for Shabbos and during the week (if you are employed check out what the commute during the week will be like)
- Try to stay with people from a different synagogue in that city on each visit
- Try to have meals with different people than the ones you are staying with so that you can meet as many people as possible in a single visit
- Ask if there are people in the community that share your interest in x, y, z and if so could you be "hooked up" with them - say you are into sci-fi, gourmet cooking, hiking, similar career
- If you are single see if you can be introduced to other single people in the community and ask them how "integrated" or "outside" the community they feel and WHY
- If possible attend a shiur or two during your visit
- Schedule a meeting with the rabbi(s) for during your visit(s) and see if you like them/click - talk to them about local Jewish resources, to describe the pros and cons of their community, whether they have noticed any problems with the community accepting converts (possible ask to be put in touch with "known" converts to also ask this question of them)
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